Twenty-Five Years

Today it has been 25 years since my car accident. 25 years since my daughter Katie passed from this world. Yet, in so many ways it is like she was just with me yesterday.

It’s an odd feeling, you know. To have someone you love so very much taken from you so early in their life. It is a difficult thing. For many years I fought with myself because, despite the fact that Katie had passed, I had somehow managed to go on.

Many people said that they would never be able to live if they lost their child.  That statement simply cut me to the bone in the early days. I truly wondered if I had done something wrong in having survived at all.

I struggled and wept. I isolated myself and truly was tortured by the horror of that day. I prayed for a miracle. I begged for a miracle and none came.

Or maybe it did. You see. Eventually I began to allow my faith to comfort me. When I was able to do that, I was able to let go and leave Katie to rest in peace.

Katie was a wonderful little girl. She had a mostly cheery disposition, loved her mother, father, sister and life. She was kind, and gentle and thoughtful in ways one doesn’t expect a six year old to be.

She had a great sense of humor, a good imagination, and not too much got her down.

Yes, it has been twenty-five years since my little girl left me and today I am grieving. I did not get to watch her grow up. I didn’t get to see her go on her first date, to her prom, or graduate from High School. There will be no college, or wedding, and I will never hold her baby in my arms.

However, I have said it before and I will believe it until the day that I go to meet the good Lord above, Love Never Dies!

So rest in peace my dearest daughter. One day we will be reunited and the time we will share will be endless.

Katie from Dackel Princess Maribeth on Vimeo.

If tears could build a stairway,

And memories were a lane,

I would walk right up to Heaven

To bring you home again.

No farewell’s were spoken,

No time for goodbye,

You were gone before I knew it,

And only God knows why.

My heart still aches in sadness,

And secret tears will flow,

What is meant to me to lose you,

No one will ever know.

Author Unknown

20 thoughts on “Twenty-Five Years”

  1. I’m still so sorry for your loss, Maribeth. And I am very sorry that your wonderful trip in Germany ends with one of the saddest days in your life.

    Hugs.

  2. You are in my thoughts and I feel for you Maribeth. What a great witness you have been to put your faith in the Lord and know that He does no wrong. I´m sure He will bless you in a special way!
    I hope you have arrived safely and wish you a good Sunday!

  3. Can’t write, I’m crying too hard. Just know I love you and I LOVE Katie, yes love never dies! HUGS, Mel

  4. I have no words of comfort greater than the love that lives on in your heart, and God’s eternal love for us all. My the Lord lighten your heart today and give you comfort through your friends. God Bless

  5. This is a beautiful tribute to your daughter. God works in ways that baffle us and we don’t know why He chose your Katie that day. But He did have a reason.
    I pray for you and your family that you may find comfort with family, friends, and faith.
    <3

  6. We’re still very sorry that you had to go through something like that. It should be forbidden for kids to pass away before the parents…. *deep sigh*

    Yet, you have some wonderful memories to keep with you in your heart for the rest of your life… She will always be with you!

    ((Hugs))

  7. 25 years. It is so unfair. Some things mark your life and it never is the same afterwards. You are in our thoughts and in our hearts today.

  8. You know I understand. My heart is with you every day, but especially on this day. Hugs and love.

  9. Dearest sister in soul and best friend,
    I am with you at all and I know how you feel. I know one day you will be with her in heaven forever….
    Love and hugs,
    Uschi

  10. Hi Mom,

    Glad that you made it home safely–now give your feet some rest! 🙂

    You know, I was really pretty amazed when I thought about it today–25 years has weight. You think, wow, so much has changed since she was a part of our everyday, and yet the love for her in our hearts is as strong and pure as ever. That will never change Mom. For all of us, a piece is missing, and we carry that piece forever, just waiting to join it back up with hers.

    Know that you are truly loved, by your friends and family, and I believe by Katie too.

    I love looking through all of these pictures. So many memories.

    All my love,

    Mandy

  11. My dearest Maribeth…

    I can only wish that we could have stayed in Berlin for just a few days more… Allowing me to share your grief, your pain and your sorrow. To celebrate the life of Katie, the love that is clearly as strong now as it was then, if not stronger…

    I believe that your dearest Katie is like your guardian angel, as Louise is mine… Looking over you daily to protect you from harm, and to shower you with love.

    You are a truely strong and inspriational woman, and I can only hope to be as strong as you are, (for a bloke) with missing my Louise…

    Send you love and HUGE ((( HUGZ )))

  12. Dear Maribeth, I jumped from that link in Facebook and landed here. I am still crying…mainly because I have a daughter the same age as your Katie was. I cannot imagine the weight of those 25 years for you. It seems like a long time for me but as you said, it seems like it just happened yesterday.

    I am amazed by your courage and strength to go on with your life. You are truly an inspiration.

  13. Already another year ? It’s now three years I share your sorrow with you. But life goes on and that’s what Kathy had certainly wanted to for her mom !

  14. Maybe this explains why I woke up so incredibly sad yesterday. Dave kept asking me what was wrong…and I couldn’t verbalize it. Katie was a sweetie and you’re an amazingly strong women whom I love very much.

  15. Dear Maribeth – I always remember this from the first time you posted about it! Words might not be of a comfort, but I hope my deepest and warm thoughts for you gets through. A big hug dear!

  16. I have just one child and every day I try to be thankful, no matter what he might be doing…it’s just a short life we live, no matter how many years.

    Katie was taken too soon, but she has touched so many. All of us reading this have been touched by the love you had for her, and by Mandy’s sweet comment! It brings tears to my eyes, but a deep love to my heart to know that love doesn’t die- it realy doesn’t! My heart aches for your loss, but my spirit is lifted by your words.

    Much love to you and your family!

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