Category: My Life

Now that I have been back home in New Hampshire for over 24 hours, I simply want to repack my bag and head down to the Cape again. I want to watch the ocean and the Ospreys and walk along the shoreline. Alas, that is not to be right now, but I do have a trip planned again this summer. That’s great, as it gives me something to look forward to.

While I was down in Falmouth, I stopped by the Green Pond Fish Market and got wonderful Stuffed Quahogs and at another shop I was able to get a Seafood Pie. I was so excited to bring these home to share them with Jack. Surprisingly, he was not too impressed with the Cape Cod fare. Perhaps one has to be raised on it, to love these delicacies.

I think in many ways, I fell in love again with Falmouth. As I drove around the familiar streets, I could recall so clearly, my time spent there. Oh well, I guess I know where I will be going over the next few years for my weekend getaways!

And I know when I go, my two faithful sidekicks, will always be going with me! We sure have a good time together!

Love you two!

Saturday proved to be a really amazing day! Not only did we enjoy two lovely gardens, but the sun shone brightly, the air was warm and the woman who made a real impact on my life, Carol, my second grade teacher, and I were reunited!

Truth be told, I have been looking for her for a couple of years. And today there she was!

There is much to write about and I will elaborate on it all in Monday’s post.

This is one of my best visits yet to my old hometown.

On Friday I leave to go home. I know that sounds funny to many of you, but in my mind, in my heart, Falmouth will always be home.

It’s where I took my first steps, learned to laugh, to love, to swim, to ride a bike. It’s where I had my first room all to myself, and where I learned to love animals of all kinds (Except, of course, mice and snakes!).

Falmouth is where I go to recharge my batteries. It’s where I go to sit on the beach and feel the wind in my hair and smell the sweet salty air.

Falmouth is where I gave birth to my two daughters. Where they both were Baptized. In fact, it’s where I was Baptized. And it’s where I got married, both times.

I love Falmouth because it was there that I learned to be a singer, an actress, a ham! (In the theatrical sense!)

I hiked the trails, walked the beaches, and climbed trees. I skated at the local ice rink. I had my first ever kiss there. I didn’t realize it then, but I was so lucky to grow up in such a place. Falmouth in the 1960’s was safe, fun and a loving place to bring up a family. I played all over my neighborhood, in relative freedom. No one worried about their kids being out playing back then. We just went and made sure to be home by supper time.

I’m staying in a motel that I used to walk past on my way to school. I don’t recall how many times I turned to look at it on my way to or from school. But I do recall thinking that one day I wanted to stay there. Now, all these years later, it’s where I want to stay and I do! And, it is just as special as I knew it would be!

So, off I go. Home to Falmouth. To relive a few memories, to close my eyes and to remember all those from my past. And most of all, to feel the ocean melt away the tensions in my soul. It’s like taking a deep breath and as you exhale feeling all the worry melt away.

In the last few years I have really thought a lot about my relationships. I wondered how the world would view me after extensive facial surgery. Would people see the scars? What would they think? I was really bothered by how I looked until recently.

You see, when I walked in the door of my daughter’s home, two wonderful children came running toward me, with their arms outstretched calling my name, quite happily!

Oma!

It dawned on me then, that they do not see my scars. They see my heart. They only know me as I am today, and their unconditional love is such a gift.

I am my own worst critic. I get close to my mirror and I see every stitch mark, every scar, and for the longest time I felt like I was not myself at all. I did not feel pretty, I did not feel happy and I was so critical about myself.

Why do we do that? Why do we judge our book (face) by the lines, or scars, or imperfections that we see there? Does it make a difference as to what is in our hearts?

My grandmother told me once, when I was a young and somewhat conceited teen, that I may be beautiful now (age 15) but that as one grew older, and went through life, if you were not a good, kind, person in your heart, it would show on the outside. Goodness and kindness lie within.

So this face I have now, although not the one I had at the age of 15, is just fine. My daughter and grandchildren love me, and they know my kind heart and my great love for them.

As I have wandered through my life these last few years I have tried to concentrate on being the best me I can be. I have stopped staring in the mirror, and when I do my hair or make-up, I try to embrace the woman I find in the mirror. She has worked so hard to repair her soul after falling down, so many times.

Be kind, be loving, and stretch out your arms to those you love. In the end, life is so very good!

Yesterday I was sitting in my chair crocheting after lunch. I looked out the window at the skies and knew that if we were going to go for a walk, we’d better do it! So, I got Jack in his coat, and picked up the leashes for Lili and Arnie and off we went.

The wind had picked up, and although the thermometer said 52 degrees, it felt much colder. I should have worn my hat and gloves, but seeing the temperature on the machine, I definitely had made a poor choice.

Our routine walk was nice. No one was around today to talk to, so we simply did our walk and came back. One notable thing was that a rather large rotten tree near our friend’s cabin, had fallen in  pieces onto the right of way road. They will need some young hands to help them get the tree moved.

Upon arriving at home, I walked Anneliese and Greta before settling in to finish up some computer work, and eventually warm up leftover Prime Rib. And I just have to say that the meat was even better the second time around! Best of all, we have one more meal of this wonderful cut of beef left.

Shortly after that, I looked out the window and it was SNOWING! Oh man! It snowed all evening, despite the temperature being in the upper 30’s.

I woke this morning and it is 32 degrees, and raining hard. Usually I walk the dackels early on, but with the rain falling, I knew they would not linger outside! And I was right. Not even Lili wanted to be out there.

My day today will be a quiet one. Maybe a little laundry, but definitely a lot of crocheting! Have a great Wednesday everyone!!!

Today is Dental Day. Every six months I force myself to put all my childhood fears aside, and “man up” and go to the dentist and smile a lot and breathe deeply and get through yet another appointment.

Now don’t get me wrong. My Dentist is a very nice man and the hygienist I use is very sweet, kind, and friendly. It’s just that all those times I went to the horrible, child-hating, dentist of my youth, really scarred me for life.

It makes me so happy that Mandy found a wonderful children’s dentist for Savannah, who proclaimed that she wanted to go to the dentist soon because she missed them! What a wonderful thing.

In many ways, life has changed for kids, since I was one. Both doctors and dentists make a point to treat their little patients well. When I met Savannah’s Pediatrician, I was so impressed by the real joy she had upon seeing Savannah again.

I recently decided to switch doctors. It was a difficult decision, mostly because I will admit to being lazy. The office was familiar, and close, even if I didn’t feel I was getting the best care. But with a little nudge from Jack, I switched to a female doctor in Manchester. She was really on the ball, took a detailed history, did a first class physical, and blood-work which found me having a cholesterol problem, and the fact that the old doctor had me on too much thyroid medication!

I bought a book on lowering my cholesterol naturally, and my medications have been adjusted. She also lined up a skin cancer screening and a few more tests.

Now I concentrate on actually eating with a purpose. Lowering my Cholesterol numbers so I can avoid taking any new medications. Anyone have any Cholesterol lowering secrets?

I am not quite sure where the time is going. All I know is, tomorrow is April 1st! Our days are getting longer and we have more daylight, so even if the temperatures are still cold, the light gives me hope that Springtime is on it’s way.

Yesterday we were in the middle of watching an old movie, “Sense and Sensibility” when the dogs reminded us that it was time for our walk. Jack and I looked at each other and decided that it was time. So, we abandoned the movie, and off we went with Arnie and Lili for our walk.

We’ve been building up and expanding our walk, and the dogs really look forward to it. I cannot recall if I mentioned that Mr. Arnie has a heart murmur now that he has entered his golden years. We have slowly increased his exercise (Arnie is a couch potato!) and changed his food. I am hopeful that we can keep him nice and healthy for a very long time!

Lili is crazy healthy, and she needs these walks to burn off all that energy! And boy does she run all around while Jack and I walk at a sedate pace. The good news here is, Jack and I both are getting stronger and Lili gets to crazy run all over the place. We do leash her when we get close to the busy road, but once we are away from it heading home, we let her go and off she runs. And there is such joy in her heart!

This morning the last Blue Moon until 2020 was just starting to set when I got up. I grabbed my old camera and my cell phone and after walking the dackels, I ran outside and took a bunch of pictures. Surprisingly, my cell phone took much better pictures than my Olympus camera.

I wish my camera was good enough to catch all the shadows on the moon itself. They were there, but not captured. I can see it in my mind, and many times I find that those types of memories are stored for me to look back on and enjoy in private.

I wish you all a blessed Easter.

I am playing with the new phone like crazy. I especially love the camera. The shots are nice and crisp and clear. The camera is easy to use and so is the phone. In any case here are some pictures I’ve taken. The poor dogs keep trying to hide! But I track them down!!!

After a little struggle, my computer is once again up and running. It seems that there was a virus in the Firefox program causing all sorts of weird things to happen. I’m not the fastest typist around, but when I typed and stopped and went back to read what I had written, it was depressing to find that the computer was only a quarter of the way through the sentence I had typed.

What my computer guru did was completely uninstall Firefox and all of it’s sub folders, and then we did a fresh install of the program. So far it seems to have worked and I am hopeful that we got all of the virus out. I really do not want to have to have the hard drive wiped.

So, most of my day has been spent setting up Firefox, installing my bookmarks and then making sure that all the passwords were up to date. And about passwords, all I can say is EEEEEK! I have so many, that I can no longer keep up. I have a locked file in a different place where I keep them all. But my goodness, it can be confusing. Especially now where many sites want you to change your password frequently and then not use any password that you might ever have used with them! Oh my!

But the machine is now almost completely programmed, at least with the important stuff, so I can sit back once again, and crochet!