Life or Something Like it

Yesterday was my first foray out since the whole Covid-19 thing started.

In the early days, during the isolation, although we had food and supply shortages, people were kind. When you left their area in the grocery store check out or saw a neighbor in your home area, everyone was wishing people “Take care and stay safe”. It seemed that people made a better effort to be nice.

Yesterday was different. People are back to not caring about each other and they are once again, rude, cruel, and hateful.

So it was at the end of my day yesterday. I stopped at the grocery and Walmart on my way home from a wonderful family parade to celebrate my granddaughters 8th birthday. I was feeling pretty good and I was happy that Savannah had a celebration.

When I came up our alternate drive to the house, I saw a sign basically telling me to keep out because this was a private driveway.

After unloading our groceries, I went back to the home of the person who put up the signs. I wanted to make sure that they understood that I wasn’t trespassing but did, in fact, have, in our Deed what is called “A Right of Way” on this road.

He said no (basically he called me a liar) and I again stated it was in my Deed. “Yeah, show me!” Then he told me I was out of line and being aggressive.

I was shaken. People have not been that aggressive with me in a long while and my frustration with the situation was in fact, building. He showed me a diagram of his property. There was no Deed in his hands. The Map dated to 1980. I said that I would bring him the Deed.

I came home shaking. I went into our files and sure enough, found our Deed. I made a copy and went back up the hill.

I showed this to the man and his wife and he starts in saying that the “Verbiage isn’t clear, he will have to think about it”.

My Deed, and the Deed for the woman behind me and the cabin behind her, was printed in 1999. It clearly states that we have a “Right of Way” on that road that the man is saying is his driveway, his property and that he doesn’t want anyone using it.

Now, who is bullying who? He was not respectful, he was rude, and his mind was closed.

I came home and sat down to flip through FB and get my mind on something else. That was stupid of me. All of the Riots and hatred were on there and that further upset me.

I’ve been told that I could never understand what a Black person goes through being targeted because of their skin color.

Not true. 

Back in 1988, I was driving back to a hotel Jack and I was staying at in Miami. I was familiar with the area, and I stopped at a store I knew to get some snacks to have in our room.

As I stepped from my car, I was attacked by 4 Black men who beat me to a pulp in their attempt to get my purse.

Why was I chosen for this beating? Because I was a single white female and in their minds easy prey.

So do not tell me that I do not understand what it is like to be victimized because of your color (or gender).

Did I go smashing windows, lighting cars on fire, or hurting people because of what happened to me? No. Did I handle it well, after the violence happened in my life? No. Did I make an effort to not judge all Black people, because of what those four hateful men had done to me? Yes. And such is my life today.

I take people as they come. Not by gender or skin color, but by the kind of person they are.

So as I sat here last night, news blaring and my mind racing with the anger shown toward me during the latter half of my day, I felt like I would simply scream.

I felt shaky and as if just one more thing would break me. I didn’t sleep well and today I am still upset about it. Thus, this post.

But I want to beg people to remember to be kind. Remember to appreciate not just your family and friends, but your neighbors as well.

2 thoughts on “Life or Something Like it”

  1. Oh my, your neighbor sounds horrible! Neighbor fights over property lines, etc. are the worst. You have to make a decision now about how to handle it. Do you want to keep”friendly” and not do anything unless he escalates? Or do you want to go all lawyer-like? One suggestion. Make a photocopy or two of the deed. Keep the photocopy with you when you plan to use your right of way.

  2. While I can understand that he didn’t know about the title, his behaviour sounds awful. Why the aggression? So bad to have a nasty and aggressive neighbour.

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