It’s been two years since the surgery that removed the cancer from my nose. Back then I thought I would go in, have a small incision and a little plastic surgery to put me back together.
But that was not what happened. A large part of my nose was removed and skin taken from my forehead, to cover my nose with skin.
I feel the first plastic surgeon botched the job and left me quite disfigured. I was lucky to find a wonderful Australian Doctor at Brigham and Women’s Hospital who worked very hard for over 6 months to repair what was left of my face.
I cannot tell you how it felt to wake up and see myself after the surgery. From late February until July of that year, I simply thought I would forever look like I went through the windshield of my car.
Then I found Dr. P. in Boston and he told me honestly that he couldn’t make me exactly as God had, but he could certainly do his best to repair my face.
Which he did. From July 2013 until the end of November of that year I saw him every few weeks for additional surgery.
Then it was over, and I knew that I needed time to recover, and for the scars to heal. I remember looking in the mirror and hoping that the bright red scars would fade away.
It seemed every day all I could see was the scars. I could not see anything positive in my appearance and I started to fall into a pretty deep depression.
It was like, one day waking up only to find that your face has been hacked and no longer belongs to you.
People said nice things, like, I looked great and they didn’t even notice the scars. But deep down, I knew they did. I just couldn’t see anything positive on my face.
On Saturday my cousin took a picture of me and for the first time in two years, I thought I actually looked pretty.
I think it was then I realized just how I had been seeing myself. And I knew I needed to snap out of it, and stop looking in the mirror, and perhaps start looking inside of myself, instead.
I am sure that must have been a journey for your personally, but I do believe that people always just saw the beautiful person that you’re inside and out.
What a poignant post. I can’t begin to fathom what you must have felt like. The second plastic surgeon sure did an amazing job, and God provided the healing, inside and out, to your image. Your picture sure is pretty, I agree. We all want to believe we’re pretty, to be told, even if we’ve never had facial surgery. Thank you for being vulnerable in your writing.
You went through a really hard time and awful experience, but look at how beautiful you look now! Yes, beautiful! I mean that! Love YOU, Mel
Kudos to your surgeon. If I hadn’t read your story, I would have never known you had surgery. And yes, you are beautiful in and out!!
What a journey you have been through. Persistence is the key with healthcare & you were stronger than you give yourself credit for. I am so thrilled with this healing for you x AW