Category: My Life

I went to North Conway yesterday and was able to visit my favorite store, The LL Bean Outlet. I’m not usually lucky with Outlet stores. My size is usually gone and I end up buying things for Hubby. There is always a ton of tall man’s stuff there and he tends to make out like a bandit!
Yesterday, I made out like a bandit! I got:
A coral sand colored mock turtleneck.

A new cream fleece bathrobe for the winter.

A new pair of winter boots.

And a new pair of lined ski pants!

Yes, I felt heady with the purchases weighing down my arms. What a joy. We even went over to Liz Claiborne where I tried on a few things, coming away with a short sleep blue shirt and a new pair of brown trousers!

Ah yes, retail therapy. It doesn’t get any better than that!

Today the joke was on me. And all I can say to Mother Nature is, “Not Funny.”

I was a little late starting dinner. This means that at 5:30 I was looking at a few cookbooks wondering what culinary masterpiece I could pull off in the span of a half an hour.

I decided that I could probably muster up a baked French Onion Soup and a Salad Nicoise. I started to slice up the onions, when, all of a sudden, WHAM!

The mother of all hotflashes hit me. Now usually if I drink some ice water and rip off all the clothes on my body I start to cool off. Today that didn’t work. It was odd. I started to feel shakey and the sweating was worse and I realized I hadn’t had very much in the way of protien at either breakfast or lunch.

I was having a hotflash AND a low blood sugar attack!

I quickly drank a large glass of orange juice, while shoving some of the gruere cheese into my mouth, (a lovely combination, to be sure!) after about 15 minutes I was back to normal, but stood there soaking wet.

Now, I have to say, menopause is definately not all it is cracked up to be. First of all, the hotflashes, have nothing to reccomend them, to be sure. You think maybe you can stand it, but I have to tell you, no matter what people say about finally feeling warm in their old age, well this is like the devil on crack! Just too darn hot!

Then there is the emotion thing. Hmmm, that’s like PMS all the time. One minute you feel okay and the next you are crying like a baby!

And my metabolism? Yep, it’s a real drag. I went from having a fairly good one to having the metabolic rate of a turtle. A 95 year old turtle that is half dead! Not fair. At this time in a woman’s life you should at least be able to indulge in chocolate and not gain weight! Chocolate would help, I just know it would!

So I’m not happy, do you hear? I am not happy at all.

Time to hit the shower, oh yeah, and put some clothes back on.

Okay, so I know what you will all say. Yes, I probably did too much, so I have no one to blame but myself for the eye ache I’m having tonight.

My only defense is: I’ve been bored! I’m passionate about my Soap Operas, but I have to tell you, when all you do is sit on your proverbial bottom and watch, (in fact listen) to the TV, you get bored fast. Even with the Soaps!!! (I know, you are shocked!)

I’ve never really known what a putterer I was until now. I will go from one thing to the next to the next and sort of watch the Soaps while I’m doing my work. This down and out stuff is murder.

So, I started doing my stuff again. Changing sheets, doing laundry, cooking meals and (I know, I know, the forbidden) I vacuumed. I couldn’t stand it another minute.

Then this afternoon after I got back from driving Greta to have her nails clipped and her ears plucked, my eye started to hurt. Ooops. Let’s see, not supposed to be driving, or vacuuming, or bending over to change the sheets. So guess the sore eye is a natural thing. Better sit down.

So I sat down and rested a bit, took some Tylenol and waited. The pain got better.

You see, although many of us think we could just give up doing the stuff we do, it’s not always as easy as we think. The first few times I did stuff, I felt good and so I tempted fate a little more and a little more. Today was my comeuppance.

So with hand over my heart I promise to be a good girl and not over do. I will do some things, but not overdo. I promise!

Tomorrow I want to make Plum Jam. It’s not hard at all. I can sit while I am slicing and pitting the plums, I can sit while I cook the Jam and then it’s just a matter of putting the Jam into hot jars and sealing them. No bending or anything required.

I guess we all need to be reminded from time to time to take it easy. Just wish my reminder didn’t make my eye hurt. Now that’s not fair! Couldn’t my Fairy Godmother have just come and hit me over the head with her wand?

I’m tired.

I decided it was time to get back to life. Actually I couldn’t stand to sit around for another moment of another day, looking at all of the things that needed to be done.

Hubby has done well. He has made sure I’ve gotten my meals and drinks and a nice place to sleep, but men don’t see dust bunnies, (or in our case huge clumps of white dog fur) newspapers on the floor or the laundry basket that has been sitting in the family room for three days.

Now some of this stuff I can deal with. I carefully stooped down to pick up the newspapers, not bending forward which would put pressure on my eye, and I scooped them up. Check

I put all the laundry in the basket and Hubby carried that down to the basement, where I did three loads of laundry. Check.

I couldn’t quite deal with the dust bunnies, so they are hopping around the house, but I plan to have Hubby get the vacuum out tomorrow so I can do that. Check

We had a small amount of plums in a basket from our tree. I got a recipe for Plum cake, and threw it all together and it came out great!! Check.

Dinner was a frozen pre-made turkey soup with German bread. Easy. Check.

So it’s a start. My mind and body are willing it’s the eye and the head that just do not want to cooperate. I know, I know. Time.

I go for my one week check up today with Dr. W. My appointment is at 11:00 AM. They will check my eye pressure, the sutures and look for any signs of infection.

Hubby is driving me in, and this will be the first time he will meet Dr. W. I know, that like me, he will like her instantly. She is just one of those really likable people.

You know the best part of all of this is, I am not nervous at all. In the past, I have always been nervous going to my eye appointments.

Having my vision back, with no glare, no prisming, etc. leaves me feeling excited and energized and confident! I also feel the eye looks better every day.

Having an incredibly black eye hasn’t bothered me at all. In fact I kind of like it. It’s my badge of courage and victory!

I wonder if Clinique makes this shade of black and blue and yellow make-up for the eyes? It could be a new fashion statement! LOL

Are you all tired about hearing of my black and blue and sore eye, yet? It seems to be the one thing that consumes me each and every moment, of each and every day. Why is this? Could it be I am entirely self centered, or perhaps, I am horribly vain, so that having this black eye is ruining my self image?

Not really. I think the biggest reason that this is on my mind to the exclusion of all else is, the happiness I feel that finally, everything has worked out and my vision has been restored!

I know, you are thinking, “Pah-leeze, I hope she doesn’t tell us the story about the 5 long years of vision loss again!”

Okay, I won’t. You have all heard it before, so I’ll simply say, that the joyous, wondrous, miraculous feeling I have inside right now, is something everyone should experience once in their lives. It makes me truly appreciate my vision, and the expertise of Dr. W.

So happy thoughts to you all on this Monday morning.

I had thought I would enjoy the time I would have to recuperate. After all, all the cooking, the cleaning and the canning had kept me busy from dawn until dusk. However, a few good nights of sleep and I feel like I am ready to go.

Of course this isn’t the case. I’ve got down time, and plenty of it, so that my eye will heal without incident.

Isn’t that funny? How often have we said, “Oh I would love to be able to sit around and do nothing”? The thing is, most of us get bored fast and I think most of us also would like to do our own thing and are used to doing it. Imagine having to ask for someone to cook a meal, or get you a drink? Water to take your pills with? It’s just foreign to me.

I’ve been caring for my family, and my home for 30 years now. I’ve done the cooking of our meals, the cleaning up and the organization. So yes, it’s hard for me to sit back and let others do “my job”.

I’m feeling better and I just need to get through the next few weeks. Then I’ll be home free. I need to relax. To rest and to stay still.

So this is me, day three. Greta is being a great nurse, and she hardly ever leaves my side. The bruises are a bit darker and there is a little bit of yellow on my cheak, but I think I’m looking totally hot! LOL

The ride into Boston had actually gone well, with very little traffic. Amanda and I were familiar enough with the area that we easily found the hotel where we used the valet parking to park her car.
We went into the hotel to see if we could check in early, (it was 8:45) and they said, “sure”.
Our room was nice with two queen size beds with fluffy comforters and soft pillows. We unpacked what could be left, and Amanda filled her brief case with work she could do while I was in surgery. Then we walked down to the Concierge and asked where the surgical part of the hospital was?
He pointed directly across the street! So in my ignorance I had chosen the perfect hotel!
I arrived on time at Tuft’s New England Medical Center on Tuesday morning. We went up to the 5th floor and I checked in. They double checked my information, weighed me, (not so bad when it is in kilograms and one is not well versed in the conversions!) checked my blood pressure and then had me change into a chic johnny and pants outfit with stretchy slippers that were too small.
I waited in a holding area reading three year old magazines until they finally called me into the pre-operative area about 11:30.
I knew I was Dr. W.’s third patient of the day, so I figured it would go fairly quickly.
A sweet young nurse who was training as a nurse anesthetist took the first of about 4 medical histories that day. She was so nice, very thorough and in the hours ahead she was very kind to me.
Patients came in and went while I lay there. I wondered what was happening, why I wasn’t going, when finally another Anesthesiologist came in to start my IV. I mentioned I had good veins but that they were small.
On his first attempt he blew the vein and I had a bubble the size of a quarter under the skin on my hand. I wasn’t too happy, but what can you do?
He finally got the IV started in my elbow area, which I didn’t like because it was difficult to move around, but I figured I was going in next and it wouldn’t matter.
However about 1 o’clock Dr. W. came in and told me that the lens she wanted to use was not in the hospital. She was trying to find one in the area. She was upset about this as she had ordered it last week.
I told her not to worry as it would all work out. I still wonder at my calmness, because I was not medicated and the day before I had really been a nervous wreck!
I asked the nurse to please go out and let my daughter know that things were not going to happen for a while and that she should go and have some lunch.
After a while I needed to get up and use the rest room. I asked for assistance and a nurses aid came over and lowered the side rail. I swung my legs over the side, and started to push myself up when I felt the side rail cutting in to my finger, I shrieked and tried to get to my feet fast, but the damage had been done, the rail had cut the cuticle area all the way down to the nail bed. I heard a crunch and the pain was terrible.
I was taken to the rest room, washed my finger there and came back where they put me back into the bed. I was bleeding like crazy and that’s when I burst into tears.
The nice nurse anesthetist came walking by and saw me and she rushed over, took my finger and cleaned it carefully and wrapped it.
Needless to say when Dr. W came out between patients and learned I had cut my finger and saw it she called for an Orthopedic consult. It wasn’t broken, but it sure was cut and hurt badly.
They got Amanda to come back and sit with me and she kept me company. She was wonderful. She got me calmed down and relaxed again.
Dr. W. came by again and explained that she had specifically wanted a certain rigid lens and that although they had two other lenses at the hospital they didn’t have that one. She had called Mass Eye & Ear and asked if they had the lens. They didn’t, but the Alcon distributor was standing there and he did have the lens she wanted and he literally drove it to the hospital himself.
Meanwhile, I needed to use the ladies room one last time before going into surgery. I had been there all day, and although I should have had my surgery around 10:30-11 that morning, I was now going to be the last case of the day at 5 PM!
So, off I went to the ladies room, extremely carefully this time, watching all my fingers and toes, and everything is going well, when all of a sudden as I am pulling up my pants, the door flies open and a male doctor starts to walk in! I’m not sure which of us was more embarrassed, probably him as he is a pediatric surgeon!
Finally I see Dr. W. hold up a box. “Here’s your lens!” she said happily.
The next thing I know the surgical team came into the holding area, and gave me a little sedation. Then they did the eye block for the surgery. When I have had this done before I have literally lost the vision in the eye during the operation. I think I prefer this.
This time, I did not lose the vision and although the images were blurry, I was able to “see” what was going on over my eye. Something that caused me to hyperventilate a little.
They gave me a little more medication, (not nearly enough, I would have given me more!) and things went on.
Then I started hearing things like, “The old lens in out.”, “The interior of the eye looks good!”, “There is a good shelf to put the lens on.”, “Oh great that’s a wonderful fit!”, “Oh I like the way this is going!”
All the positive statements made me relax. I felt so confident. I could hear all that goodness!
She told me what she was doing, they needed to put in stitches to secure the lens. They checked the lens placement several times, checked for leaks and then closed my eye and bandaged it up.
Dr. W. told me how well the surgery had gone, how happy she was and that the stitches she put in would have to remain for some time.
They wheeled me to recovery and I met up with some nurses who I do not believe knew what was happening with my case, nor do I think they particularly cared.
They told me the opposite of everything that Dr. W. had told me about my post operative care. One nurse even gave Amanda a hard time when she reached her on her cell phone to tell her that the surgery was over and I could go.
When Dr. W. came in to see me again I asked her several questions and she answered them the way I knew she would. No activity, no bending, or picking things up, and I would need pain medication because the surgery had been quite invasive and she had put in quite a few stitches.
Once I was unhooked from the IV I could return to the hotel with Amanda.
I got to the hotel about 7 o’clock and Mandy went off to get my pain medication. We ordered room service, called everyone to tell them I was doing okay before my cousin, Janet arrived with camera in hand.
I was up visiting until about 10 and then slipped off into a strange sleep.

The next morning we ate breakfast at the hotel, and the staff at the front desk upon seeing my eye all wrapped up, asked kindly how the operation had gone. “So far, so good!” I told them all.
The Front Desk manager gave us hot cookies to celebrate.
We were off to Dr. W.’s office for a 9 o’clock appointment, and I felt that things moved along much faster.
I was taken to a room where the patch was removed and I sat for a moment with both of my eyes closed. Slowly, I opened them, and blinked a few times.
“Well?”
“I have no glare or prisming!” I felt like crying I was so happy. In fact I think I actually did cry a little.
The doctor who assisted with my surgery examined me next and was really pleased with what he saw. He remarked about how difficult the case had been and that Dr. W.’s skill was clearly responsible for such a good outcome.
Finally I went in to see Dr. W. She examined the eye, talked to Mandy and me about the events of the surgery. She was so pleased with the outcome and as I was telling her how I was feeling, I started to cry and to laugh all at the same time. She reached over and we hugged!
After 5 long years the prisms and glare are gone and my vision is normal once again. When I think about it all, I feel the tears start again.
Mandy drove me to a Burger King half way to my home where we met Hubby. We had a quick lunch and then said our good byes.
I’m so grateful to my daughter. She took such good care of me during this. I could not have gone through all of this without her steady calm love. Thanks, sweetie!
Now it’s time to rest, relax and keep my head up. It’s sort of a weird way to sleep, but I managed a pretty decent night last night.

Greta is finally snuggling with me again after giving me the cold doggie shoulder for the first 2 hours I was home yesterday. Fritz doesn’t hold grudges, so he has just been happy to have me home, period!
So that’s my story. The good, the bad and the truly fantastic!

Hi Everyone. I am home, I am well and my surgery was a complete success! It’s a long story, for perhaps Friday when I am a little more rested, but I thought you would like to see how much I was missed and how colorful my eye is.
Thank you for your prayers and your best wishes. I know that it made all the difference!