Mostly I do very well. I try not to dwell on the accident, and the greatest loss of my life, the death of my six-year-old daughter.
Oh, I miss her like crazy, but in order to go forward in my life, I had to put all those emotions and feelings in a box and place them in a storage unit on a shelf in my mind.
Katie was a sweet and loving child. She was quick with a smile and her laughter put a smile on my face.
She had a kind heart and loved her family deeply, especially Amanda. She was a good friend to many.
I wasn’t thinking about her, at least not actively, when I was out the other day. I was driving around doing errands and as I slowly drove down Main Street, I saw a little red-haired girl, skipping down the street, laughing and holding the hand of her mother. As she skipped, her red curls bounced around her head.
For just a moment I was taken back in time. I could see Katie in my mind, doing the same thing with me.
The mist of time was all around me and I could feel Katie with me. I slowed my car, and looked to see if, if, …
This was all for a split second or two and then the feeling left me, as I could quite plainly see, this was not Katie.
That’s when I recalled that for the first few
months, years, I used to search for Katie in large crowds. Part of me not wanting to believe she was really gone.
This has been on my mind the last few days as I wondered if I should share this story on my Blog. I have only written about Katie on the anniversary of her birth and death. But this does happen occasionally to me and it breaks my heart all over again.
When I lost my dearest friend, Candy, I sat holding her hand and when we talked about the end of her life, I told her that real love never dies. I truly believe this.
I guess for me, for the part of me that still yearns for my little girl, I still feel all that love, and I guess I see her in my mind’s eye.
One day I know, we will be together again. After all, real love never dies.